Marry me, Brian Joubert. I love you for your quadruple/triple toe combination, your shiny black costume with green numbers all over it, your long program set to the Matrix soundtrack, your dodge-the-bullet-a-la-Keanu move just before your straight line footwork, and your blunt desire to be world champion. Oh, and you're French. I don't know about having your babies, but I'll cook you Korean food once a month, when you have a day off between competitions. Now that's love, at least it is from me.
Oh, I also love Richard Clarke. His testimony yesterday was kickass. Oh, the drama, when the entire room fell silent for what felt like an eternity after he flat-out said that Bush's war in Iraq undermined the war on terror. The pissing contest between him and that Thompson guy, with Thompson ultimately slinking away with "well I'm from the midwest so I don't know anything," was highly entertaining. And he finally apologized for 9/11, although of course those words should have come out of the mouths of others. Hopefully people won't fall for the Bush administration's desperate scrambling to undermine Clarke's credibility.
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
Oh, and I finally picked up Loudain Wainwright III's album, The Last Man on Earth, and I love it to pieces. Most of the songs are about death, his mother's death in particular, which is of course up my alley. I like his wry sense of humor. It's a little strange to notice all the cross-references in his and his son's (Rufus Wainwright's) albums. I can't help but think about each in relation to the other. I do wonder, though, if he stands by his claim in the song "The Last Man on Earth" that he doesn't "give a damn which idiot runs this country" after what has happened in the last few years (I think the album was recorded back in 2000 or early 2001, before 9/11).
I'm reading the book Terrorism and Tyranny by James Bovard, which is primarily about the Bush administration's response to 9/11, particularly its curtailing of civil liberties via the Patriot Act. The first few chapters discuss the first war on terrorism during the Reagan administration and how subsequent administrations failed to act responsibly towards the threats of bin Laden and Al Qaida, leading up to the W. Bush administration's willful ignorance and lack of action before September 11th. It's been good to recap the events leading up to 9/11, especially since the 9/11 commission hearings took place today and will continue tomorrow. Although the Clinton administration certainly had their fuckups (its handling of the first WTC bombing, its failure to procure bin Laden after Sudan offered to capture him, the useless bombing of an abandoned Sudanese pharmaceutical factory), at least Richard Clarke appeared to realize the magnitude of the Al-Qaida terrorist threat at the time that the Bush administration took over, although he and George Tenet were apparently ignored by Dr.Rice and the rest of Bush's administration. Ugh. This is probably old news, but I missed a lot of these details the first time around (due to the stress of newly starting medical school, I guess), and am pretty horrified as I read about them now. Not to mention how ridiculously scary and unconstitutional the Patriot Act is, and how proposals for amendments were promptly shot down, and how it was rushed for approval before most of the signers even had a chance to read it.
I'm reading the book Terrorism and Tyranny by James Bovard, which is primarily about the Bush administration's response to 9/11, particularly its curtailing of civil liberties via the Patriot Act. The first few chapters discuss the first war on terrorism during the Reagan administration and how subsequent administrations failed to act responsibly towards the threats of bin Laden and Al Qaida, leading up to the W. Bush administration's willful ignorance and lack of action before September 11th. It's been good to recap the events leading up to 9/11, especially since the 9/11 commission hearings took place today and will continue tomorrow. Although the Clinton administration certainly had their fuckups (its handling of the first WTC bombing, its failure to procure bin Laden after Sudan offered to capture him, the useless bombing of an abandoned Sudanese pharmaceutical factory), at least Richard Clarke appeared to realize the magnitude of the Al-Qaida terrorist threat at the time that the Bush administration took over, although he and George Tenet were apparently ignored by Dr.Rice and the rest of Bush's administration. Ugh. This is probably old news, but I missed a lot of these details the first time around (due to the stress of newly starting medical school, I guess), and am pretty horrified as I read about them now. Not to mention how ridiculously scary and unconstitutional the Patriot Act is, and how proposals for amendments were promptly shot down, and how it was rushed for approval before most of the signers even had a chance to read it.
God, it's been a long time. I've been kind of avoiding thinking about a lot of things, hence the lack of posts. But hopefully I can change that soon.
I participated in the Medical Student Faculty Show as a singer and a writer. It was called "Gray's," as in "Gray's Anatomy," and was based on the musical Grease (although the conflict is between a goody-two-shoes internist and a gunner surgeon instead of a "good girl" and "bad boy"). I wrote an Attending Rounds scene, a Third Year party scene, and a Match Day scene, all in the span of five hours (from 3 AM to 8 AM on a Monday morning). The latter two scenes had only a few lines before the songs ("You're the One that I Want" and "We Go Together" respectively, both from Grease). Anyway, here's the Attending Rounds scene. It's obviously a spoof of the show American Idol. I came up with the idea of this scene, and I think it actually does capture the competitive nature of attending rounds for the medical students, and also how arbitrary the responses from the attendings can be. I channeled some of the hate directed towards me from surgery attendings into the Dr.Simon character. I think the first and the last songs are written decently...the middle song, "Harder to Breathe," is insanely awkward and I wish I put more time into it, but the singer actually handled it with aplomb.
ATTENDING ROUNDS SCENE
This is a spoof of American Idol. There are three “judges,” who are attending physicians, seated at a table. There is the mean one with the British accent, “Simon,” who is a typical asshole surgeon type. There is the sweet nice one, “Paula,” who is the fluffy psychiatrist type. And there is “Randy” who is some internal medicine whatever guy (I’m thinking endocrinologist but it really doesn’t matter) who says “dawg” repeatedly. Meanwhile, the medical students, take stage one by one to “audition” with their patient presentations. There’s student #1, student #2,(who may be already established supporting characters) and Sandy. There is also the host-type character who interviews the students and asks them how they think they did.
HOST: Welcome to Medicine Attending Rounds! We have three medical student contestants who will perform their patient presentations, and we have our three esteemed judges, Dr. Simon, Dr.Paula, and Dr.Randy, who will choose our new Medical Student Idol. First up, Ladies and gentlemen, Student #1!
Music cues: “Here Comes the Sun” by the Beatles.
STUDENT #1:
Here come the runs, Here come the runs,
and it’s not right
Diarrhea, that’s this poor patient’s chief complaint
Diarrhea, it seems like years since it’s been clear
Here come the runs, here come the runs
Diarrhea, it could be caused by Norwalk virus,
Rotavirus, or it could be C.difficile.
Salmonella, Giardia,
And it’s not right
Runs, runs, runs, here they come…
Runs, runs, runs, here they come…
For assessment, well it’s clear that it’s diarrhea
Next the plan is, we rehydrate and culture her
Here come the runs, here come the runs
And it’s not right
Applause, or lack thereof. Student #1 nervously awaits the judges’ remarks.
PAULA: Student #1, I love how you put your heart into your performance. I could see that you were trying really hard to do well. You need to work on your pitch and phrasing, but you have a lot of potential. Good job. Thumbs up.
RANDY: You did your thing, dawg, and I respect that. It was a’ight. Just a’ight.
SIMON: I don’t know what planet you two are from. That was dreadful. Simply dreadful. You should hire a lawyer and sue the people who advised you to pursue this profession. And this institution should be ashamed of accepting your money to do labor for them. After all the presentations I’ve witnessed, I can safely say that you’re the worst medical student in America.
HOST: Aw, man! That’s pretty harsh, Dr. Simon. Do you have anything to say, Student #1?
STUDENT #1 (groveling): Dr. Simon, you are absolutely right and I’m horrible, but I can do better. Please still consider giving me honors! I’ll do anything! Anything!
SIMON: My failing you would be a gift to the medical profession. You simply don’t have what it takes.
STUDENT #1 is dragged off the stage by the HOST.
HOST: Okay, now for Medical Student #2!
Music starts: Maroon 5’s “Harder to Breathe”
STUDENT #2:
So this patient’s chief complaint is sudden dyspnea
He’s got HIV and CD4 of twenty-uh,
He’s had night sweats, fever, chills, headache, and hacking cough.
And he’s also noncompliant with his meds and stuff
So at the ED his O2 sat dropped to eighty-four,
And he was given two liters by nasal cannula
His O2 sat rose and then next he had some cultures drawn
He was admitted but his symptoms are not close to gone
Rash allergy to septra and noncompliant with meds
Which are dapsone and azithromycin, while on lung exam
He’s tachypnic and got decreased breath sounds in his bases you see
His chest x-ray shows bibasilar ‘terstitial opacities
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
So for our plan we’ve got him on 2L Oyxgen
And for his PCP we’re giving him some primaquine
We also ruled him out for pulmonary embolism.
And he’ll get steroids for hypoxia and optimism.
Mr. B, he’s got HIV, and he’s noncompliant with meds
CD4 count is low and so he’s at pretty significant risk
His symptoms as well as his chest x-ray suggest PCP
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
Student #2 has tons of attitude, and smugly awaits the judges' comments.
PAULA: Medical student #2, I could see your spirit dancing as you were presenting that patient. You’ve really got that extra factor to be a great physician some day. Good job! Thumbs up.
RANDY: STUDENT 2, STUDENT 2, STUDENT 2. You’re the man, dawg. That was tight. Yeah!
SIMON: (dramatic pause) Well, it was just all right. I’ve heard better. You have strange facial expressions while presenting which I found rather distracting. I think I would have liked your presentation better if I kept my eyes closed.
HOST: Do you have anything to say to that?
STUDENT #2: Well, I just did my thing my own way, and some people won’t like it, but I don’t care what other people think. Dr.Simon has his opinion, and I have mine.
SIMON: And I was going to give you a passing grade! Never mind, I will fail you instead!
Student #2 gives a "whatever" face and flounces offstage.
HOST: And now for our third and final contestant, Sandy!
Music starts: Peggy Lee’s “Fever”
SANDY:
Fever is the chief complaint here, and swollen lymph nodes under the jaw
With the fever comes blurry vision, chills, also anorexia
He’s got a fever – but no skin rash, no bleeding or bruising in sight
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
PMH does not give a clue here, and sex affairs he can’t recall,
Allergies? None to speak of, he’s taking no meds at all
He’s got a fever – Pulse 90’s, temperature is 39
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
Leukoplakia on his tongue there, and some focal LUQ pain
Cervical lymph nodes are swollen, also tender to the touch,
This may be from a sort of infection, or maybe something autoimmune.
Could also be a type of cancer. A biopsy is scheduled soon.
He’s got a fever – we’ll do some cultures, for viruses and rickettsiae.
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
Applause.
RANDY: Sandy, Sandy, Sandy. Yo, that was off the hook! You need to teach a class, show all these other students how to get this done. You’re definitely getting Honors, dawg!
PAULA: I have tears in my eyes; that was just wonderful. You hit all the notes on that presentation perfectly. You’re going to be a star physician, Sandy! Honors to you!
SIMON: That was perfect. There is no question in my mind that you have won this competition. You’re the only student today who was worth my attention. I give you Honors as well.
HOST: Congratulations! It looks like you’re our new Honors Student! What do you have to say to that, Sandy?
SANDY: I…I…I was great! I didn’t hold back, I kicked ass with my presentation, I’m getting Honors, and…*gasp* I like being a gunner! Maybe I shouldn’t have been so hard on Danny…oh Danny, I understand now why you’ve been so aggressive about school. If only we could work things out…
End scene.
I participated in the Medical Student Faculty Show as a singer and a writer. It was called "Gray's," as in "Gray's Anatomy," and was based on the musical Grease (although the conflict is between a goody-two-shoes internist and a gunner surgeon instead of a "good girl" and "bad boy"). I wrote an Attending Rounds scene, a Third Year party scene, and a Match Day scene, all in the span of five hours (from 3 AM to 8 AM on a Monday morning). The latter two scenes had only a few lines before the songs ("You're the One that I Want" and "We Go Together" respectively, both from Grease). Anyway, here's the Attending Rounds scene. It's obviously a spoof of the show American Idol. I came up with the idea of this scene, and I think it actually does capture the competitive nature of attending rounds for the medical students, and also how arbitrary the responses from the attendings can be. I channeled some of the hate directed towards me from surgery attendings into the Dr.Simon character. I think the first and the last songs are written decently...the middle song, "Harder to Breathe," is insanely awkward and I wish I put more time into it, but the singer actually handled it with aplomb.
ATTENDING ROUNDS SCENE
This is a spoof of American Idol. There are three “judges,” who are attending physicians, seated at a table. There is the mean one with the British accent, “Simon,” who is a typical asshole surgeon type. There is the sweet nice one, “Paula,” who is the fluffy psychiatrist type. And there is “Randy” who is some internal medicine whatever guy (I’m thinking endocrinologist but it really doesn’t matter) who says “dawg” repeatedly. Meanwhile, the medical students, take stage one by one to “audition” with their patient presentations. There’s student #1, student #2,(who may be already established supporting characters) and Sandy. There is also the host-type character who interviews the students and asks them how they think they did.
HOST: Welcome to Medicine Attending Rounds! We have three medical student contestants who will perform their patient presentations, and we have our three esteemed judges, Dr. Simon, Dr.Paula, and Dr.Randy, who will choose our new Medical Student Idol. First up, Ladies and gentlemen, Student #1!
Music cues: “Here Comes the Sun” by the Beatles.
STUDENT #1:
Here come the runs, Here come the runs,
and it’s not right
Diarrhea, that’s this poor patient’s chief complaint
Diarrhea, it seems like years since it’s been clear
Here come the runs, here come the runs
Diarrhea, it could be caused by Norwalk virus,
Rotavirus, or it could be C.difficile.
Salmonella, Giardia,
And it’s not right
Runs, runs, runs, here they come…
Runs, runs, runs, here they come…
For assessment, well it’s clear that it’s diarrhea
Next the plan is, we rehydrate and culture her
Here come the runs, here come the runs
And it’s not right
Applause, or lack thereof. Student #1 nervously awaits the judges’ remarks.
PAULA: Student #1, I love how you put your heart into your performance. I could see that you were trying really hard to do well. You need to work on your pitch and phrasing, but you have a lot of potential. Good job. Thumbs up.
RANDY: You did your thing, dawg, and I respect that. It was a’ight. Just a’ight.
SIMON: I don’t know what planet you two are from. That was dreadful. Simply dreadful. You should hire a lawyer and sue the people who advised you to pursue this profession. And this institution should be ashamed of accepting your money to do labor for them. After all the presentations I’ve witnessed, I can safely say that you’re the worst medical student in America.
HOST: Aw, man! That’s pretty harsh, Dr. Simon. Do you have anything to say, Student #1?
STUDENT #1 (groveling): Dr. Simon, you are absolutely right and I’m horrible, but I can do better. Please still consider giving me honors! I’ll do anything! Anything!
SIMON: My failing you would be a gift to the medical profession. You simply don’t have what it takes.
STUDENT #1 is dragged off the stage by the HOST.
HOST: Okay, now for Medical Student #2!
Music starts: Maroon 5’s “Harder to Breathe”
STUDENT #2:
So this patient’s chief complaint is sudden dyspnea
He’s got HIV and CD4 of twenty-uh,
He’s had night sweats, fever, chills, headache, and hacking cough.
And he’s also noncompliant with his meds and stuff
So at the ED his O2 sat dropped to eighty-four,
And he was given two liters by nasal cannula
His O2 sat rose and then next he had some cultures drawn
He was admitted but his symptoms are not close to gone
Rash allergy to septra and noncompliant with meds
Which are dapsone and azithromycin, while on lung exam
He’s tachypnic and got decreased breath sounds in his bases you see
His chest x-ray shows bibasilar ‘terstitial opacities
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
So for our plan we’ve got him on 2L Oyxgen
And for his PCP we’re giving him some primaquine
We also ruled him out for pulmonary embolism.
And he’ll get steroids for hypoxia and optimism.
Mr. B, he’s got HIV, and he’s noncompliant with meds
CD4 count is low and so he’s at pretty significant risk
His symptoms as well as his chest x-ray suggest PCP
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
He’s got pneumocystis p and it’s getting harder and harder to breathe
Student #2 has tons of attitude, and smugly awaits the judges' comments.
PAULA: Medical student #2, I could see your spirit dancing as you were presenting that patient. You’ve really got that extra factor to be a great physician some day. Good job! Thumbs up.
RANDY: STUDENT 2, STUDENT 2, STUDENT 2. You’re the man, dawg. That was tight. Yeah!
SIMON: (dramatic pause) Well, it was just all right. I’ve heard better. You have strange facial expressions while presenting which I found rather distracting. I think I would have liked your presentation better if I kept my eyes closed.
HOST: Do you have anything to say to that?
STUDENT #2: Well, I just did my thing my own way, and some people won’t like it, but I don’t care what other people think. Dr.Simon has his opinion, and I have mine.
SIMON: And I was going to give you a passing grade! Never mind, I will fail you instead!
Student #2 gives a "whatever" face and flounces offstage.
HOST: And now for our third and final contestant, Sandy!
Music starts: Peggy Lee’s “Fever”
SANDY:
Fever is the chief complaint here, and swollen lymph nodes under the jaw
With the fever comes blurry vision, chills, also anorexia
He’s got a fever – but no skin rash, no bleeding or bruising in sight
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
PMH does not give a clue here, and sex affairs he can’t recall,
Allergies? None to speak of, he’s taking no meds at all
He’s got a fever – Pulse 90’s, temperature is 39
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
Leukoplakia on his tongue there, and some focal LUQ pain
Cervical lymph nodes are swollen, also tender to the touch,
This may be from a sort of infection, or maybe something autoimmune.
Could also be a type of cancer. A biopsy is scheduled soon.
He’s got a fever – we’ll do some cultures, for viruses and rickettsiae.
Fever - in the morning, fever all through the night.
Applause.
RANDY: Sandy, Sandy, Sandy. Yo, that was off the hook! You need to teach a class, show all these other students how to get this done. You’re definitely getting Honors, dawg!
PAULA: I have tears in my eyes; that was just wonderful. You hit all the notes on that presentation perfectly. You’re going to be a star physician, Sandy! Honors to you!
SIMON: That was perfect. There is no question in my mind that you have won this competition. You’re the only student today who was worth my attention. I give you Honors as well.
HOST: Congratulations! It looks like you’re our new Honors Student! What do you have to say to that, Sandy?
SANDY: I…I…I was great! I didn’t hold back, I kicked ass with my presentation, I’m getting Honors, and…*gasp* I like being a gunner! Maybe I shouldn’t have been so hard on Danny…oh Danny, I understand now why you’ve been so aggressive about school. If only we could work things out…
End scene.
Saturday, March 06, 2004
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